How to Trick Kids into Thinking You're Playing With Them, When Really You're Just Lazy.
1. Over-Enthusiasm.
"Mom let's have a race!"
"OK! Let's see how fast you can run to the end of the yard and back, and I'll time you, GO!!!"
*Cheer them on and repeat praises and starting lines as many times as you can until they either catch on or go do something else*
"Mom, let's build a HUUUUGE block tower"
"YEAH! Ok, show me how we should start!"
*Let them do the project on their own as long as you can stretch it. Maybe even dare to close your eyes for two minutes*
2. Self-Benefiting Logic.
"Mom, you have to STAND to throw the ball"
"Yeah but when I'm sitting I'm the same height as you, so it makes it easier to aim right?"
*Right???*
"Mom climb up as high as me!"
"Ok"
*Stand and reach to where they are*
3. Verbal Acknowledgement.
Lots of "Wow!" and "MMhhM!" and "Oh No!" and "Amazing!", even if you're sleeping on the couch at the time.
"Mom, open your eyes!"
"Yep they are"
*not*
"Here mom, have some hippo soup"
"Om nom nom, yummy!"
*Eyes still closed, didn't move*
"Did you see that!"
"Sure did! Pretty awesome!"
*Eyes still closed, didn't move.*
4. Encouraging Independence.
"Mom, can you get all the sand toys set up?"
"You know where they are! Can you find them? Then you can choose which ones you want."
*Grab a 30 second power nap*
"Mom, get out of bed, I"m hungry"
"You know where the apples are, you can go grab one. I'm coming"
*Cover head with blankets and hope that they'll intercept someone else in the house to divert attention from the fact that you haven't moved*
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"Can YOU get the tractor??"
ReplyDelete"hmm i dunno..."
*haphazardly throw out an arm in the general direction of the toy on the complete opposite side of the room*
"..darn, my arm JUUUUUST isn't long enough. I might need someone to bring it a little closer..."
My guys are a little older so they catch on, but sometimes I can pull off similar tactics.
ReplyDelete"Libby, come on! Let's play Lego!"
"Ok, I'll be there in a minute. You guys get it set up."
Or I use the bathroom as an excuse to take a breather. "Aja, you play my character for a minute while I'm in the washroom." *Take my sweet time peeing, washing and drying hands.*